memoryborn | [Text | Filtered from Xemnas]

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[Text | Filtered from Xemnas]

I hope this is clear enough: to people who know about him, don't harass Xemnas. We know what he's done, and while we know what he's like, it's a bit different here. Threatening him isn't going to help matters. We can keep watch until he actually does something, but don't aggravate him too much.

If anything, I'll try to handle him.

And to the person who sent him that threatening message: stop it. You're not helping.

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One of the things he wanted? What, you mean becoming human?

Yeah... At least, I think it was one of his wants.

You think... Well, why would he have wanted to do that? What was wrong with the way he was before?

[Not that she can't think of several very good reasons, but she wants to know what his were, specifically.]

[ She places the Gear on the table with a sigh. ]

He was a Nobody. A very powerful one, in fact. Nobodies are people in our World who have lost their Heart to darkness. When that happens, the person becomes a Heartless, wandering around searching for Hearts. If that person is strong enough, they can also form a Nobody.

[ Xion says this slowly and calmly, because she knows this explanation about her World's logic could get strange. ]

While the Heartless is just the darkness within a person's Heart running wild, a Nobody is formed of the Body and Soul. Hearts are needed to feel emotions, and since he was the leader, Xemnas wanted a heart to feel again.

[ Pause. She looks down at that. ] That's what I thought, at first.

[She takes a moment to take this all in.]

Okay... I think I follow that. Your "heart" sounds like my "soul", and your "soul" sounds like my "mind". If I think of it like that your explanation makes sense. So a Heartless would be like a sort of wraith, trying to regain what it lost, wherease a Nobody would be an empty shell... but they could still move with their willpower. That's actually pretty amazing.

[Borderline Third Magic, really.]

But doesn't that mean it was easier for him to carry out his plans since he couldn't feel? Maybe the easiest way to deal with him is to let him make connections and even friends. If he actually cares about someone besides himself, that might take care of the problem for us.

But it wasn't about that.

[ Xion interjects with a bit of a snap. She looks back down a bit, old, untended feelings welling up. ]

It was easier for him, sure, but then why would he still want it so badly? He wanted a power he couldn't control. [ She raises her hand to stare at it, as if the Keyblade would come to her at the mention of it, but she quickly drops it. ]

Hearts are more powerful in our World because they allow for certain abilities to be possible if you had a heart.

[Well, that is a powerful retort, if only because of Xion's vehmenence. Ilya considers what she's just been told for a moment.]

So he didn't want to feel emotions again, he just wanted more power... but now he has the emotions, but not the power. But you said he got something he wanted when he got his heart back, despite that?

Edited (grammar fail) 2013-08-30 03:36 (UTC)

He wanted to have a heart, yes. But I don't think it was for the same reason he told us.

[ Pause. ]

I helped him towards that goal. It was a mistake I couldn't undo.

Xion...

[Okay, that does it. She gets up from her chair and goes around the table.

You're getting a hug, replisis.]

[ She blinks when she feels Illya's arms wrap around her head. As she's still sitting, her cheek is pressed against Illya's chest; she can hear a heartbeat. This surprises her and she wonders why she's doing it all of a sudden, but she remembers how Fang would be the same - spontaneously being physically affectionate.

She lets out a sigh, letting herself be hugged. Her arms do go up to loosely hold onto Illya's sides in return. ]

I don't want him to hurt others. [ Like he did with me and my friends. ]

[That's enough of a return of her hug for her not to let go. She rubs Xion's head gently, nodding at her statement.]

I know you don't. You're that type of person.

[A good one. Unlike herself, who wouldn't care as long as it wasn't anyone she liked.]

But at the same time, you don't know how to stop him, and you're worried trying will only make things worse, right?

[ She nods, her lips forming a thin line as she thinks further on that. ]

It isn't like back home, where he had actual power. Even then... There was a reason why he was in charge for more than just that.

[ Another pause. She really doesn't want Illya to get involved in the sense that she might catch Xemnas' attention if they keep this up. But as the other girl said before... ]

I have to keep an eye on him. [ Her voice is almost a quiet plea, as if asking Illya to let her do this and to let her do it in a certain way. Even if Xion herself might get hurt. ]

And how exactly do you plan to do that?

[Ilya's voice in turn is hard, stern... but not entirely unyielding. She mostly just wants to be certain Xion has a plan. Preferably a non-self-sacrificing one.]

[ She pulls back at that, noticing the tone and fixing Illya with a look. It isn't an angry or disapproving one, but there's a sense of determination. ]

I'll have to check up on him every now and then. That means I have to go back to him... maybe even when he calls.

What? No!

[Perhaps surprisingly, it's not anger that flashes in Ilya's eyes, but fear.]

Xion, you cannot be alone with a man like this! He probably views you as his property, there's no telling what he'll do if he gets the chance! You have to stay away from him!

[ She pauses. Xemnas did say that, even if he doesn't remember her, she still wore his coat and was numbered by him. Therefore, she's a responsibility to him. But how much of that was true.

She glances to the side. She doesn't want to make Illya scared for her, but what else is there? They couldn't leave him entirely alone. ]

I'm not going to be alone, Illya. I'll have my Pokemon with me next time.

Suddenly I realize why Saber was never comforted when I told her that.

[Biting back her panic, she schools her expression into a cold glare.]

He has his own Pokemon too, you know. I realize they aren't as strong as yours yet, but they will be. And the way you're going about this, he'll have the advantage of surprise when he decides to attack you.

[When. Not if. Interesting choice of words there...]

But he doesn't even remember me.

[ Is the quick snap. And... oops. That. She didn't mean that to slip out. Quickly, she tries to find another way to cover that up. ]

He had other people working for him. It's kind of why the hood of my coat is so... big. We hide our faces.

[ ... was that better? ]

It doesn't matter if he- wait... what?

[Yeah that explanation is completely unacceptable, there's no way she's going to believe it.]

You hid your faces... all the time? Even from each other? Even from him? Xion, that doesn't make any sense.

I wasn't important, okay?

[ The snap is becoming more apparent. There's bitterness in her tone, but it's subdued. ]

You're hiding something from me.

[It's not even a guess. Ilya's a master of hiding things she doesn't want people to know, and she recognizes the signs of something like that being close to being uncovered in Xion's snappishness and urge to divert the subject.]

You have a reason to believe he won't go after you, but you don't want me to know what it is.

[ She makes a frustrated sound at that, turning to face at her cooling food. She'd told only a few people about the nature of her being, and very few about what happened to her afterwards. Now that she's gotten to know Illya... she's not sure if she should know further.

She trusts Illya, but it's because of that trust that, well... Xion doesn't know what to say. ]

[Her hands clench into fists as she tries, desperately, to keep her temper under control. Blowing up and screaming at Xion for being such a stone wall about this, whatever it is, is not going to help.

Instead, she breathes in deep. Once, twice... three times and she manages to relax herself enough to actually speak without yelling.]

Xion... just answer me this much. Do you believe, really believe, that you can keep yourself safe from him with nothing but your own Pokemon to protect you?

[ She opens her mouth... and closes it again. She thinks on that a bit more. Xemnas is older, wiser, and more intelligent than she is, but still...

Her expression darkens to a frown, and when she speaks, her tone matches: ]

If he finds me useful, he won't need to do anything. If I sense something wrong, he won't know what hit him.

[ Regarding Xemnas, even Xion wouldn't be opposed to going around his back and trying to get an opportunity in. He's most likely doing the same with her. ]

[And oddly enough, that response gets Ilya to smile... a cold, cruel smile, but a smile regardless.]

Good. That is what I wanted to hear. And on that note... if he does overcome you, I will realize it. I will inform Saber. We will find you. And I will break him.

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